Movie Review/Rankings
Well, it's been quite awhile since I've reviewed any movies. So long in fact that the movies I'm about to review are movies I watched about 3 months ago. However, I do not see this as a problem since I feel this gives me a chance to gain perspective on them. There isn't anything great here, but I am finally getting a chance to rank that excellent streak of three 7/10 movies... a rare occurance. Anyway, here they are:
The Aristocrats, 2005:
7/10, 18th best movie of 2005, 136th best of the 2000's, 429th all time
This movie was easily the funniest documentary I've ever seen. Granted this isn't saying much, but the movie was genuinely very funny and entertaining. Basically its 100 or so comics all discussing this one joke called The Aristocrats. Heres how it goes:
"A couple walk into a talent agent office saying they have an act. The talent agent asks, 'what's your act?' they say their act is that they (insert offensive act i.e. shit in eachothers mouths, have sex with their children, rape dead boddies, etc.) The talent agent asks, 'what do you call this act?' they reply, 'the aristocrats'."
The joke can be told any number of ways, but the main idea is simply to be as offensive as you possibilly can. Now this movie isn't for everyone. In fact let me give you a little test. Try to think of the most horrible/offensive thing you can think of someone saying. If you wouldn't see I movie where someone says this, than don't see the Aristocrats, because odds are someone said whatever you just thought of. I however loved it. Of chorse after watching it Zach and I attempted our own aristocrats joke. I remember very little of it, but I know it involved me having sex with and than harpooning a large whale-like woman, and Zach playing some sort of ring toss game with parts of his recently murdered grandmother's body. Anyway, like I said it was funny.
Good Night, and Good Luck, 2005
7/10, 16th best of 2005, 127th best of the 2000's, 421st all time
An excellent movie I enjoyed a lot. This was not the most exciting material to work with, but the movie did a great job in keeping me from getting bored. Also what'shisname who played Edward R. Murrow did an amazing job. The one problem I saw with this movie is that it sort of felt like it was always building up to a huge climax that never really comes. Thus just sort of a few small climaxes, there was no single big huge event, which is what I was expecting. But its still a great movie with a good message. When people start to get scared to say their opinion about the government we enter a dangerous time. Joe McCarthy was a political bully, and a bully is just gonna throw his weight around untill somebody stands up to him. I think you'd have to be blind not to know that we have some bullies in the government right now, and I guess were all just waiting for someone to stand up to them.
Inside Man, 2006
7/10, 3rd best of 2006, 143rd best of the 2000's, 436th all time
That third best is misleading because this was the third movie of 2006 I'd seen. However, last is also misleading because all three were very good movies.
Inside Man was directed by Spike Lee. Prior to seeing Inside Man let me give you a list of all the Spike Lee movies I've ever enjoyed watching: 1. Malcolm X 2. hmmm... ummmm... nevermind. So I didn't really have that high of expectations. However, I have to admit that this movie is extremely well made. It's evident from the beginning of the movie. In the first 5 minutes of the movie the camera shot changes every five seconds. Normally this would just annoy me, but the editor managed to do this without wasting a single one of those five second shots, and with great accompanying music it was acctually one of my favorite opening sequences ever. While the camera work is great throughout what really makes this movie stand out are the great performances by the two leads. Clive Owen is great as a "not your everyday bankrobber" and Washington is wonderful, somehow giving an incredibally fresh performance in spite of the fact that he's playing a cop for what seams like the 11th time in his past 12 films. Its an interesting story with some decent twists and better than average dialouge. This is just a very good movie with something for almost everybody.
Two Men Went to War, 2002
5/10, 32nd best of 2002, 220th best of the 2000's, 671st all time
A war comedey from England, Two Men Went to War is based on the true story of two British dentists who invaded Germany with pistols and grenades months before the invasion of Normandy, and acctually lived to tell about it. The movie was allright, and actually had some pretty funny moments. However, the movie certainly had its faults. The actor playing the young soilder played him a little two goofey and stupid, the older soilder was played quite a bit better. Overall this movie was just okay. If it sounds like something you'd like, you'll probobly think its all right, if it sounds like you wouldn't like it, you probobly won't.
A Sound of Thunder, 2005
3/10, 47th of 2005, 338th of the 2000's, 1021st all time
Its probobly a good idea to tell you that that 47th puts it in dead last for its year. This just wasn't a good movie. Let me assure you that I went into this movie wanting to enjoy it. Now, this movie requires a tremendous amount of suspended disbelief just to not want to kill yourself while watching it. And I did my best to suspend my disbelief. Going in I know that the plot of this movie was that a man goes back in time, steps on one butterfly, and changes the chorse of evolution completely so that not a single plant or animal species anywhere on earth stays the same. I was fine with that. However, this movie also gets harder to believe because it quite simply has the worst graphics I have ever seen in a major motion picture... ever. After seeing the graphics I assumed that this movie was made for about 20 million dollars, it wasn't, they spent nearly 80 million dollars on this movies.... I really have no idea where it could have possibilly went. I have friends who could have created better graphics on their home PCs than are in this movie. This movie has a plot that I was intruiged by, actors I like (Ben Kingsly/Sam Rockwell) and is in a genre where I ussually reasonabally enjoy movies eithers might hate (action/sci fi hybrid). Yet even I could only stomach giving it a 3/10. If anyone else was to give this movie a 1/10 I certainly couldn't blame them.
Upcoming Rankings:
Cane Toads: An Unnatural History, 1988
Run Ronnie Run, 2002
Hostel, 2006
Deep Blue, 2003
The Omega Man, 1971
The Aristocrats, 2005:
7/10, 18th best movie of 2005, 136th best of the 2000's, 429th all time
This movie was easily the funniest documentary I've ever seen. Granted this isn't saying much, but the movie was genuinely very funny and entertaining. Basically its 100 or so comics all discussing this one joke called The Aristocrats. Heres how it goes:
"A couple walk into a talent agent office saying they have an act. The talent agent asks, 'what's your act?' they say their act is that they (insert offensive act i.e. shit in eachothers mouths, have sex with their children, rape dead boddies, etc.) The talent agent asks, 'what do you call this act?' they reply, 'the aristocrats'."
The joke can be told any number of ways, but the main idea is simply to be as offensive as you possibilly can. Now this movie isn't for everyone. In fact let me give you a little test. Try to think of the most horrible/offensive thing you can think of someone saying. If you wouldn't see I movie where someone says this, than don't see the Aristocrats, because odds are someone said whatever you just thought of. I however loved it. Of chorse after watching it Zach and I attempted our own aristocrats joke. I remember very little of it, but I know it involved me having sex with and than harpooning a large whale-like woman, and Zach playing some sort of ring toss game with parts of his recently murdered grandmother's body. Anyway, like I said it was funny.
Good Night, and Good Luck, 2005
7/10, 16th best of 2005, 127th best of the 2000's, 421st all time
An excellent movie I enjoyed a lot. This was not the most exciting material to work with, but the movie did a great job in keeping me from getting bored. Also what'shisname who played Edward R. Murrow did an amazing job. The one problem I saw with this movie is that it sort of felt like it was always building up to a huge climax that never really comes. Thus just sort of a few small climaxes, there was no single big huge event, which is what I was expecting. But its still a great movie with a good message. When people start to get scared to say their opinion about the government we enter a dangerous time. Joe McCarthy was a political bully, and a bully is just gonna throw his weight around untill somebody stands up to him. I think you'd have to be blind not to know that we have some bullies in the government right now, and I guess were all just waiting for someone to stand up to them.
Inside Man, 2006
7/10, 3rd best of 2006, 143rd best of the 2000's, 436th all time
That third best is misleading because this was the third movie of 2006 I'd seen. However, last is also misleading because all three were very good movies.
Inside Man was directed by Spike Lee. Prior to seeing Inside Man let me give you a list of all the Spike Lee movies I've ever enjoyed watching: 1. Malcolm X 2. hmmm... ummmm... nevermind. So I didn't really have that high of expectations. However, I have to admit that this movie is extremely well made. It's evident from the beginning of the movie. In the first 5 minutes of the movie the camera shot changes every five seconds. Normally this would just annoy me, but the editor managed to do this without wasting a single one of those five second shots, and with great accompanying music it was acctually one of my favorite opening sequences ever. While the camera work is great throughout what really makes this movie stand out are the great performances by the two leads. Clive Owen is great as a "not your everyday bankrobber" and Washington is wonderful, somehow giving an incredibally fresh performance in spite of the fact that he's playing a cop for what seams like the 11th time in his past 12 films. Its an interesting story with some decent twists and better than average dialouge. This is just a very good movie with something for almost everybody.
Two Men Went to War, 2002
5/10, 32nd best of 2002, 220th best of the 2000's, 671st all time
A war comedey from England, Two Men Went to War is based on the true story of two British dentists who invaded Germany with pistols and grenades months before the invasion of Normandy, and acctually lived to tell about it. The movie was allright, and actually had some pretty funny moments. However, the movie certainly had its faults. The actor playing the young soilder played him a little two goofey and stupid, the older soilder was played quite a bit better. Overall this movie was just okay. If it sounds like something you'd like, you'll probobly think its all right, if it sounds like you wouldn't like it, you probobly won't.
A Sound of Thunder, 2005
3/10, 47th of 2005, 338th of the 2000's, 1021st all time
Its probobly a good idea to tell you that that 47th puts it in dead last for its year. This just wasn't a good movie. Let me assure you that I went into this movie wanting to enjoy it. Now, this movie requires a tremendous amount of suspended disbelief just to not want to kill yourself while watching it. And I did my best to suspend my disbelief. Going in I know that the plot of this movie was that a man goes back in time, steps on one butterfly, and changes the chorse of evolution completely so that not a single plant or animal species anywhere on earth stays the same. I was fine with that. However, this movie also gets harder to believe because it quite simply has the worst graphics I have ever seen in a major motion picture... ever. After seeing the graphics I assumed that this movie was made for about 20 million dollars, it wasn't, they spent nearly 80 million dollars on this movies.... I really have no idea where it could have possibilly went. I have friends who could have created better graphics on their home PCs than are in this movie. This movie has a plot that I was intruiged by, actors I like (Ben Kingsly/Sam Rockwell) and is in a genre where I ussually reasonabally enjoy movies eithers might hate (action/sci fi hybrid). Yet even I could only stomach giving it a 3/10. If anyone else was to give this movie a 1/10 I certainly couldn't blame them.
Upcoming Rankings:
Cane Toads: An Unnatural History, 1988
Run Ronnie Run, 2002
Hostel, 2006
Deep Blue, 2003
The Omega Man, 1971
posted by Blake Stockdale at 4:15 PM
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