Best of my 2008 Tearaway Calander

Okay, now this is going to be a best of list of my 2008 tearaway calander from the comic strip "Brevity". Now some of these are funny with just the words, and some of them you need to see the comic strip for them to be funny. However, after looking at them if you have to explain what's in the picture very much, it's not going to be funny, because it just doesn't translate. So I'm just going to write what they say and not really try very hard to explain anything, so some of these won't really make much sense. But anyway, here the are.

1. Suddenly John realized he didn't want paper OR plastic. He wanted something new... something fantastic.
2. Man looking at a bum: "Boy, that guy sure likes cans."
3. Most people don't know that tug-o-war got its start in the late 1600's when, for a brief period of time, rope was considered legal tender.
4. Judge: "One last time Mr. Gallagher 'what happens in vegasstays in vegas' is not, nor will it ever be, an acceptable legal precedent."
5. The town of Irony, Pennsylvania, has long been known for being very literal.
6. Saint Andrew: "where you at?" Suddenly, God wondered if Saint Andrew had a cooler cell phone than him.
7. Man on park bench: "Watch outm that squirrel's about to steal your crumbs!"
8. They stayed up all night listening to NPR and doing a shot every time someone said 'unilateral'
9. Detective: "We ran some samples back at the lab... it's dirt all right."
10. Skydiver: "So that's where I put my bear."
11. Woman: "I'm glad I just ordered a salad, he'll think I'm so dainty." Man: "Is she going to eat that WHOLE salad!"
12. Mongol: "Well gentlemen, we've captured the known world. What's next.... tea? Parcheesi? A little nappy nap?
13. The next few years wold be very litigious
14. Early archeology: "It appears to be some sort of bone"
15. Lion: "Look a that plumage, he must be the alpha male."
16. Suddenly, awkwardly, Andy realized he was snapping along to the funeral dirge.
17. Soon the honter-gatherers wold spread from sea to sea, while the scrounger-breakdancers would fade into oblivion.
18. Man talking to his dog: "whatever. crosswords are stupid."
19. Foosball man looking at nerdy kid: "oh great, we'll never win with this nerd on our team."
20. Well it was definitely an ax, and he was clearly a maniac, but I don't know... 'wielding' implies a whole level of skill I'm just not sure this guy had."
21. "Ah, pants. My old nemisis."
22. King: "I now knight you, 'Sir Kneelsalot'."
23. Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold.
24. Detective, "The profile says our suspect is a something of a ladies' man... you're free to go."
25. Dog: "He's always tring to get rid of that stick. I bring i back just to torture him."

Best of 2008

Okay, were going to do something a little different here. Rather than giving you the best books written in 2008 or songs relased in 2008 or movies that premiered in 2008... I am going to give you the best books that I READ in 2008, songs that I first ENJOYED in 2008, and the movies that I first SAW in 2008. This is an important distinction because I don't have to worry about when something was made to put it on my list, which is kind of neccesary, because I don't really read/listen to/watch all that much current media. So without further explaining of the thing that I'm doing now, I give you:
The Top 20 books I read in 2008:
1. The Silence of the Lams, Thomas Harris
2. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
3. The Exorcist, Peter Blatty
4. Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert Heinlein
5. The Sirens of Titan, Kurt Vonneguet
6. Battle Royale, Koushun Takami
7. Death Rat, Michael J Nelson
8. Our Band Could Be Your Life, Michael Azzard
9. Hando, Louis La’morre
10. Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
11. Glass Soup, Jonathan Carol
12. The Onion Field, Joseph Wambaugh
13. Ball Four, Jim Bouton
14. The Quick and the Dead, Louie L’moore
15. Unfinished Tales, JRR Tolkien
16. The Tower Managerie, Danial Hahm
17. Frankenstein, Merry Shelly
18. Robinson Curuso, Danial Dafoe
19. Who’s Afraid of a Large Black Man, Charles Barkley
20. Slaphappy, Thomas Hackett

Top 20 Songs I Enjoyed this Year:
(I say enjoyed because although I had heard some of these songs before, this is the first year I really liked them)
1. Small Bones Small Bodies, The Future of the Left
2. Nickname, Qadir
3. Boyz-In-The-Hood, Easy E
4. The Auctioneer, Steve Goodman
5. Motorpsycho Nightmare, Bob Dylan
6. Fette’s Vette, mc chris
7. Pisol Packin’ Mama, John Prine
8. Carmalita, Warren Zevon
9. Academy Fight Song, Mission of Burma
10. The Seeker, The Who
11. Straight Outta Compton, NWA
12. Lula, Bright Eyes
13. Dear Abby, John Prine
14. 88 Lines About 44 Women, The Nails
15. Great Compromise, John Prine
16. 6 O’Clock News, John Prine
17. Misunderstood, Wilco
18. Sadle in the Rain, John Prine
19. Dead Man’s Blues, Thistles and Thorns
20. In the Garden, John Prine

Top 20 Movies I Saw this Year:
1. The Dark Knight
2. Battle Royale
3. Juno
4. The Prestiege
5. Iron Man
6. Prince Caspian
7. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Krystal Skull
8. Step Brothers
9. Semi-Pro
10. Futurama: Bender’s Game
11. Futurama: Bender’s Big Score
12. Hot Rod
13. 30 Days of Night
14. The Shootist
15. Tropic Thunder
16. Idiocracy
17. Futurama: The Beast with a Billion Backs
1. Pinapple Express
19. The House Bunny
20. The Brothers Solomon

Anyway that's it, see ya'll next year